Project X Newsletter Expanded, issue #84May 16, 2003
1. Opening Words - New Domain! - Alexander Aldarow
2. The Problem & The Solution Lie Within YOU - Asoka Selvarajah
3. Home The Wanderer - Star Princess
4. It's not Bush, it's not Saddam..... IT'S MARS!! - Mark Andrews
5. We the Bearers of Light - Alishaya
6. World Brotherhood Union - Vedia Bülent Çorak
7. A Special Angel - Mark Andrews
Opening Words - New Domain! (view on a separate page)
Author: Alexander Aldarow (all articles by this author)
Good afternoon, my dearest friends!
As promised two weeks, I have a huge announcement for all the visitors
and readers of Project X website - we have moved to a new, independent
domain, http://www.ChosenOnes.net!!! As the site's webmaster, I see this as a big leap from ads-clogged free services to an on-line freedom and unlimited options, which I only
began to scratch. In the months to come, more features will be added to
our site, and its outer design might be changed as well. Several new departments
have appeared at ChosenOnes.net, such as Experiences, Articles and Arts,
where over 400 articles, categorized by themes and authors, are featured!
An inner search engine was added; the Postcards gallery, under Arts, was
fixed, and now you can send a virtual postcard with an original painting
to your beloved ones. As always, you are welcomed to leave your opinion
about the site in our guestbook and participate in discussions on the Free
I am always open to new ideas regarding the site and possible cooperation
with other webmasters. By the way, if you have a link pointing to Project
X, please update it to the new URL. If you have a homepage and wish to
exchange links, or if you'd like to contribute an article for the newsletter,
And now that I've shared my joy with you, let us continue with today's
The Problem & The Solution Lie Within YOU (view on a separate page) (more articles about guidance)
Author: Asoka Selvarajah (all articles by this author)
Whatever your lot in life, you doubtless consider it to be a combination
of external factors: some positive and others negative. Doubtless, this
is partly true. However, it may surprise you to know that at any point,
barring acts of God, your future is almost entirely in your own hands.
This may sound like too much to bear or believe. After all, if it were
true, there would be no excuses left. You could not blame your situation
on your parents, the government, your boss, your husband or wife, your
race, or anything else. Hence, most of us prefer to reject this thought.
That leaves us with plenty of excuses, and a comfortable, if rather mediocre,
Napoleon Hill's book "Think & Grow Rich" makes it clear that Success
only comes to those rare few who (a) create a major definite purpose they
burn to achieve in their lives, and (b) pursue that purpose with total
determination and persistence, to the point of apparent folly in the eyes
of others. Interestingly, the qualification is NOT that you need any prior
experience or talent in that which you seek. Rather, it is the purpose,
backed with the determination to never give up in attaining it, combined
with tapping into the Infinite Intelligence of the universe, that brings
about lasting Success.
However, most of us think differently. You may think that you cannot
succeed because you do not have enough experience, or because you have
little money, or because you are disadvantaged in some other way. If so,
you need to consider the examples of people like Henry Ford and Thomas
Edison. Both of these men had nothing more than basic schooling. Van Gogh
learned to paint relatively late in life. Stevie Wonder is blind. The world's
leading cosmologist, Stephen Hawking, is in a wheelchair and cannot even
speak without a voice machine. Oprah Winfrey was born black, dirt-poor,
and was abused as a child. Excellent qualifications for becoming the highest-paid
TV personality in America?...
The basic problem that holds the vast majority from achieving astonishing
success is that they lack self-esteem at the very deepest subconscious
level. We place a ceiling on what we are capable of achieving, because
it makes us feel better about ourselves and our own mediocre achievements.
It's better to shield ourselves with dozens of excuses than to admit to
ourselves that we could have done better, if only we had the guts and the
We spend our entire lives crawling around on our knees beneath this
insanely low ceiling we created for ourselves. An absurd image? That's
the way you are probably living your life.
Within certain obvious physical limits (e.g. a 70-year old trying to
win the Olympic 100m), there is almost NOTHING that someone else has achieved
that you could not achieve too, if you had a burning desire to do it, made
this the major definite purpose of your life, and pursued it with relentless
determination. Burn the ships and the bridges and then head forward. No
excuses or fallbacks. You succeed or you die. That is the only attitude
for achieving the very highest levels of attainment. The artist, Michelangelo,
said he would not be considered a genius if people only knew how many hours
he sweated to achieve it.
The Comfort Zone is the greatest barrier to Success. If you achieve
a certain level of the latter, the temptation to relax and bask in the
weak sunlight of what you've attained can be overwhelming. A high level
of dissatisfaction serves as excellent motivation to spur you further.
That way, you will take risks, which is the only way to move forward rapidly.
If you take NO risks in life, you may as well be already dead. In fact,
the most common regret of dying people is the things they did NOT do, and
the risks they did NOT take.
Attaining success in any undertaking SHOULD make you feel uncomfortable
and challenged. Things are only totally comfortable when you are not making
any progress. That is why it is called the Comfort Zone. However, it's
that way because nothing is happening. Maybe a coffin is comfortable too?
However, to succeed in your chosen major definite purpose, you need
to shed the garbage of your upbringing. Examine your beliefs and values
carefully. Where did they come from? Did you think them up or inherit them?
Are there any contradictions there that hold you back? For instance, if
you want to become rich, but have a deep-seated belief that rich people
are crooks, how likely are you to succeed? Isn't it like driving with the
Most of the time, this is exactly what you are doing. Another example.
You want to be promoted and given more responsibility at work? However,
when you look within, you don't feel worthy of it, or even believe that
your colleagues are better than you.
Some deep self-examination is necessary. Take time with yourself and
ask yourself what your limiting beliefs are. Working on deepening your
sense of self-esteem is the most important work you can do. It precedes
any external success you may wish for.
Once you have deep self-esteem, you won't "care what the morons think",
as multimillionaire businessman, Dan Pena, so graphically puts it. If you
are afraid of failure, it's almost certainly because failure is frowned
upon in our society. After all, how will you look to friends and family?
"I told you so" will be the inevitable response. Right?
So what? Why care? Don't bother what the morons think. When Tom Watson,
founder of IBM, was asked by a hungry young executive how he might progress
much faster within the company, Watson answered, "Double your failure rate."
THAT should teach you how important the opinions of the morons really
are. This is something they don't and can't understand. That is why they
remain exactly where they are. INCREASE your rate of making mistakes in
order to accelerate your successes, and make them ever more dramatic. It's
the only way. However, you can only do that if you feel good inside about
yourself, and don't care what others think.
In conclusion, external factors have less to do with where you are at
than you may ever have imagined. The main factor for dramatic success or
failure lies within. So, next time you stand in front of a mirror, ponder
the eyes looking back into yours. The answers to every success in your
life, now and in the future, lie right there... staring back at you.
Copyright 2003. Asoka Selvarajah. All Rights Reserved.
Dr. Asoka Selvarajah is the author of "The 7 Golden Secrets To Knowing
Your Higher Self" course. Asoka's work helps people achieve their full
potential, deepen their understanding of mystical truth, and find joy in
their true soul's purpose. He offers you a FREE 14-Day LifeBreakthrough
e-mail course at:
Home The Wanderer (view on a separate page) (more articles about literature)
Author: Star Princess (all articles by this author)
In the shining corridors of Light
I walk alone at first it seems
Earth and sky recede to blend into
Gorgeous hue - purple, gold and blue.
Words stagger, gasp and fall
Releasing eternal vibrations clear,
Language blends, becomes LOVE and
Walks in Beauty alone.
Myriads of souls merge, entwine,
Blend into rhythmic cadence;
Eternal music wafts e'er in my soul,
Singing, flowing awareness.
Times, ages, worlds - all condense,
I Am of ever Being reigns
Long in time may it have been,
That maternal womb of the Divine.
Time now gasps a last repleted
Breath, New Life now breathes;
Ego's little pains seared o'er
Passion in her pain.
Floods into the whirling vortex
Of Eternal Flame molded
Anew, yet ever old;
I AM and always so.
Time, pain, soul's bare
Estrangement, all pass;
One bright Light, flame
Of Eternal Existence shines.
Creator. created - all One
Separateness now lost,
In Allness the soul
Rests in its Eternal Home.
It's not Bush, it's not Saddam..... IT'S MARS!! (view on a separate page) (more articles about guidance)
Author: Mark Andrews (all articles by this author)
March 23, 2003
Why does it seem that war is suddenly inevitable? What might be different
now than a year ago?
In August of this year, 2003, the planet Mars
(the astrological harbinger of war) will be the closest that it has been
to earth in nearly 75,000 years. As it has been drawing nearer to earth,
humanity has been reacting to the lower (Base Chakra) impulses that the
Martian energies trigger in the human physiology.
Where we might have before sought diplomatic
means for conflict resolution, we now - under the expounded influence of
Mars - are more quick to react to a situation with the primal, animalistic
impulses that drove our prehistoric ancestors.
We will also be more apt to react with anger,
and to feel "attacked" in our interpersonal dealings. We might also expect
to be subject to paranoias as this unseen "enemy" (Mars) tugs at us; leaving
us to find an earthly scapegoat to blame for our inexplicable emotional
imbalances. Having the awareness of this fact makes it easier for you to
regain control of your impulses and energies.
Countering the gravitational influences of Mars.
Resetting your personal balance.
At the base of your spine is the Base Chakra,
it is the first in a series of energy centers that rise from your spinal
base (the tail bone) to distribute the Universal Life Force - Prana - throughout
your anatomy, and out through you to all of creation. Chakras are swirling
(cone like) vortices that connect your various forms; your physical, creational,
etheric, emotional, mental, psychic, and spiritual bodies to each other
to maintain your balanced existence in the 3 dimensional world.
A brief listing of the 7 primary chakras is as follows:
1. The Base Chakra.
At the spinal base.
Emits and reacts to the color RED.
Supplies primal, self preservational energies. Also channels rejuvenating
energies throughout the full system.
Influenced by EARTH and MARS
2. The Creational (Sexual) Chakra.
Located mid-way between the naval and the genitals.
Emits and reacts to the color ORANGE.
Supplies creational and recreational energies.
Influenced by PLUTO and MARS
3. The Solar Plexus Chakra.
Located in the solar plexus region.
Emits and reacts to YELLOW and GOLD.
This is the seat of the personal identity; the ego.
Influenced by the SUN
4. The Heart Chakra
Located at the center of the chest.
Emits and reacts to the colors GREEN and PINK.
This is the healing center of the full system.
The Heart Chakra is also the seat of the emotional body (the soul).
Influenced by the MOON and VENUS
5. The Throat Chakra
Located at the base of the throat.
Emits and reacts to the color BLUE.
This is the seat of rational thinking (left brain connection) and communicative,
Influenced by MERCURY
6. The Brow Chakra (The 3rd Eye)
Positioned at the center of the brow / forehead; roughly at a triangular
point above the eyes.
Emits and reacts to the color INDIGO.
This is the psychic receptivity and transmission center.
Influenced by URANUS
7 The Crown Chakra
At the top "crown" of the head.
Emits and reacts to VIOLET and WHITE light energies.
This chakra is also known as the "God connection", because it is from
this center that you are truly at one with the "I AM" Spirit of the Universe.
Influenced by NEPTUNE
Each of the chakras emanate energies in a balanced
harmony with all of the others, but as well, each has a particular "balancing"
chakra that is designed to keep it in balanced alignment with itself and
with the whole system.
In the case of the Base Chakra (Martian primal
energies) the balancing chakra energy center is the CROWN CHAKRA.
As the chakra energies rise up from the earth
and into the full human anatomy, they travel primarily along the length
of the spinal column. In its optimum movement, the base (primal RED) energies
seek to move upward in a coiling - snake like - ascent to pass out of the
body through the top of the Crown chakra.
If there is exceptional magnetic or gravitational
pull on the Base chakra, the energies that might otherwise spiral freely
up and through the Crown can be constricted; causing reactions in the individual
such as explosive anger, hyper tension, and overt aggressiveness. (As is
presently being evidenced in the thinking and actions of both world leaders
as well as common individuals.)
The goal in achieving a Base to Crown energy
flow balance is to create a system wide balance through the activity of
the HEART Chakra. This can be done through the focus of willful forgiveness
toward others, and the purposed "warm" feelings that come with love and
The more the Heart Chakra is allowed to flow
freely, the more the full balance (healing) of the human anatomy is made
We often use the expression "from the heart"
to denote something that is true or genuine. - "The real thing". - As we
send love to another, the Heart chakra is automatically energized, and
emits healing, balancing energies to the object of our affection.
This process of loving "from the heart" can
be applied on both personal and planetary scales. As the planet Mars draws
ever closer to earth, you can keep yourself and those who you love in a
better state of balance and health through the simple - but irresistibly
effective - flow of Universal, unconditional love: beaming out through
your Hearth chakra.
And you will also find that you are all the
more healthy, happy, and connected to yourself, those who you love, and to The Universe itself.
We the Bearers of Light (view on a separate page) (more articles about literature)
Author: Alishaya (all articles by this author)
We bear Light for the world to see
We walk the trail and in truth we live
It is not an easy way
The way is sprinkled with memories
To discard the layers we have grown
Takes an incredible amount of strength and love
Each day we look at things past
And yank them from our hearts and thoughts
To forge the way for our fellow man
Is not an easy path to go
We look at mist
Illusion and misbegotten energies
And dig often into pain and blood
The tentacles of illusions reach deep within our cores
Do you think it is easy to Walk in truth, in light, in love?
Than you might ask, why walk at all?
So you my brothers all
May live in Light, in Peace and Love
For if we don't walk the path
We might not be able to walk at all
The way is often steep
The pebbles might be boulders
that you can't even see
but know my hand is there for thee
As I trust that yours is there for me.
Know the higher we go
The purer the air
The easier the path
More Love to share
More Peace to be
As One we shall be
For all the stars to see
In awe they are
To know that we
Have risen much
Has it been done
Never before has the Light of Love
In each dimension
In each space of time
If it weren't for you and me
Live to serve and serve to live,
Walk in Light, She/He will always guide,
Walk in Light and there will be Peace,
Soul Name: Alishaya
Native American Name: Knukquni (Sheep Girl)
Reverend Edith Bello Church of the Creator (COTC)
I remain in a state of Divine Right Order ®
Dwell for a moment in a single blade of grass.
Discover the secret of snowflakes.
In these patterns lie harmony, my child.
In harmony, the universe.
World Brotherhood Union (view on a separate page) (more articles about guidance)
Author: Vedia Bülent Çorak (all articles by this author)
Information about the characteristics of the age we live in and our
The Age we are living in at the moment is an Age with many great characteristics,
compared with the past Ages. And this characteristic has been revealed
to our Planet gradually since the year 1900. In this last age, our aged
World, together with all the creation it sustains on it has entered an
accelerated evolution zone.
While the cosmic currents showering our planet develop the conscious
human being in a positive way, unfortunately they affect negatively some
consciousnesses that have not yet been able to complete their evolution
properly. For this reason at the moment, while our world is exhibiting
a tableau where good and evil live together, it is also experiencing its
In no other period, our World has ever longed for Peace and Friendship
as much as it has in this last age. The human being, who has attained consciousness,
as the master of his World, in his efforts to save and protect it, is henceforth
calling all humanity to Peace - Friendship - Unification. And at this moment,
many positive and spiritual focal points sharing the same view have been
established in our planet for this reason.
Henceforth, the only word used very often by everyone serving on the
path of humanity is Peace - Love - Friendship - Brotherhood. We, too made
official our Universal work which we have been taking into effect since
the year 1966 in Anatolian Turkey as “the World Brotherhood Union Universal
Unification Center Association and the World Brotherhood Union Mevlana
Supreme Foundation” in the year 1993. We are an establishment serving humanity
through THE KNOWLEDGE BOOK setting out from the philosophy of Mevlana without
making any discrimination regarding Race-Religion-Language-Gender and we
are one of the mosaics, which will complete the perfect World Paneau of
The aim of our Foundation and Association is to invite Humanity under
the Roof of a Brotherly World by introducing the Spirit of Unification
and Consciousness of Brotherhood at home and abroad and to prepare Human
beings for the Reality of Unified Humanity by setting out from the principle
of Atatürk, "Peace in the Homeland, Peace in the Universe" and to
provide the evolution of Humanity towards a Universal Consciousness.
Our center is the city of Istanbul in Anatolian Turkey. Our Association
has branches in the cities of Ýzmir, Ankara, Antalya, Bursa, Tekirdað,
Adana, Mersin, Çorlu, Edirne. Apart from this, we are carrying on
with our activities in district centers of Istanbul such as Bakýrköy,
Beþiktaþ, Üsküdar, Fatih, Kartal, Sarýyer,
Maltepe, Þiþli, Ümraniye, Beyoðlu and Beykoz.
At present, we are serving Humanity with quite a large potential, connected
to this program. At our Central focal point only (apart from the branches
in other cities and districts) we have 1650 members. In addition, we have
many focal points serving in the medium of the Knowledge Book in the entire
World. Some of these are in Germany, Israel, and USA. Apart from this,
we are in a continual dialogue with many friends who are in contact with
us and who are serving on the path of the Knowledge Book in many cities
of Europe, Australia and America.
Our Book has been fully translated into English, German, French, Hebrew,
Russian, Serbian and Albanian. The complete set of fascicules has been
taken into distribution, in these languages. In the year 1996, it has been
published in book format in English and Turkish and at present second editions
of these are also in effect. And in 2002, publication of the Russian version
of our Book was taken into effect and German version is got ready for publication.
This year, we are planing the publication of Hebrew and French versions
of the Knowledge Book.
The Knowledge Book is at present being translated into Swedish by a
Swedish friend living in Canarian Islands, into Japanese by a Japanese
friend, into Polish by a Polish friend, into Norvegian by a Norvegian friend,
into Spanish by an American friend and into Persian by a Iranian friend
living in the USA.
Subject matter of our Work is the Knowledge Book seminars and the declaration
of the Universal Facts. At our branch centers, seminar studies are held
regularly every week.
What we are trying to do at the moment is to place a brick for the foundation
of the Happy World of the morrows by projecting Universal Brotherhood Consciousness
on human Consciousnesses. However, our Totality which appropriates to itself
the idea that these calls should be taken into effect no longer individually
but as a mass, has arrived at a decision to set out on the path, hand in
hand with all our brothers and sisters who share this view.
For this reason, since the year 1995, every year on the 1st of November,
we have been taking into effect a Symposium with the slogan "Call
to World Peace from the Universal Brotherhood" (http://www.dkb-mevlana.org/webK2001.QXD.pdf).
It gives us pride and happiness to greet in this way all our brothers and
sisters serving in the World Unification Project.
The subject of the symposium, the 9th of which we have taken into effect
with the same slogan this year is "Suggestions and Messages to be given
to Humanity on the Path of Unification and Peace in the Globalizing World".
To this Symposium, we invite friends as speakers who are the representatives
of the many spiritual focal points serving on the path of Friendship, Unification,
Peace, Brotherhood in the entire World. In this way, we are taking into
effect a Universal Unification of Knowledge.
It is our greatest wish to form a World ring together with the entire
Humanity hand in hand on the Path of Light.
Vedia Bülent Çorak - email@example.com
President of the Foundation - http://www.dkb-mevla
A Special Angel (view on a separate page) (more articles about else)
Author: Mark Andrews (all articles by this author)
A memorial to a most remarkable woman.
June 13, 1926 -
April 18, 2003
Young Geneva had a bad habit of befriending all sorts of "wild" animals
in the rural surroundings of Southern Indiana. It was her family's enduring
trial to put up with her kind-hearted nature toward the world's most helpless
and least wanted creatures. (She had a charismatic aura that drew all animals
to her in a way that would make Ellie Mae Clampet jealous!).
Geneva was also what we would today refer to as a collector of "pour
souls". She couldn't bare to allow anyone to suffer or to "go without"
without doing what ever she could to help alleviate their situation. So
it was not too surprising to her family when 14 year old Geneva announced
that she had decided to quit school in order to go to work at a near by
psychiatric hospital. She was physically quite developed for her age, so
she was able to successfully fib about her age, saying that she was the
required age of 16 needed to work in the state's mental health system.
Even before bombs fell at Pearl Harbor, 14 year old Geneva was learning
to care for schizophrenics and others living in the internal anguish of
mental illness. In the 1940's, the state of psychiatric health care was
barbaric, to say the least. Patient care amounted to providing reasonably
clean conditions in which the patient would be "chained and shackled".
Psychotropic medications at the time were nearly non-existent. Those medications
that were available were used solely to sedate as opposed to achieving
a chemical balance within the recipient as prescribed in today's formulas.
State of the art mental health treatment in the early 40's was electro-shock
therapy (shock treatments). Geneva supervised literally thousands of patients
during their shock therapies. She had placed herself at the very bottom
of the "Snake Pit" - as depicted in the black and white Hollywood movie
of the same name.
But Geneva was at peace in giving love and caring to so many who had
been "put away" by their families. She felt that it was her life's calling.
Geneva often told the story of the night in the late 1940's when a devastating
fire destroyed the hospital complex in the southern part of the state where
she had first worked. Amazingly, all of the patients and workers escaped
unharmed. Then came the slow and arduous train ride in mail cars in which
hundreds of psych patients had been chained to the floors and walls to
be transported north to Indianapolis to be relocated in an expanded area
of the (then) Central State Hospital For The Insane. Geneva remained at
the patients' side all along the way, and into their new facility.
As time went along - and mental health care began to emerge as a creditable
field - the changing of the hospital's name to the more civilized "Central
State Hospital" reflected the developing social conscience toward the mentally
ill. I came to work at Central State in June of 1975. If I remember correctly,
I met Geneva within the first couple of weeks of my employment. We immediately
struck up a friendship based on our common priorities and a shared (and
sometimes "wild") sense of humor. As Geneva so often observed, "As awful
as it is to work around here, if you can't find some way to laugh about
it, then YOU'LL go crazy."
Geneva was transferred to the Deaf Unit (where I had always worked)
when that service was combined with her Suburban Southeastern Unit in 1981.
We had each put in requests to be transferred from day shift positions
to the 11P - 7:30 A shift (without the knowledge of the other's request).
Hospital staffing being what it is, C.S.H. was more than happy to grant
both of our requests. And so for the rest of my time at Central State,
Geneva and I were co-workers, and became the closest of friends.
I brought her to work and back home again. We shared a keen interest
in the paranormal, and found the "haunted" grounds at Central State to
be a source of great intrigue. But most of the time, the otherwise quiet
"wee-hour" hallways of the Deaf / SSU Unit were almost always echoing with
Geneva had a favorite phrase that she would utter before breaking out
in uproarious laughter...... "Ohhhhh, Lord!"
As would be supposed, Geneva had more than her share of humorous stories
accumulated through her many years as a psychiatric care worker. She had
so much experience working with the mentally ill that she had a real "sixth
sense" when it came to a patient's needs and their quickly changing moods.
She could get any patient to cooperate under any circumstance to accomplish
Geneva never cared to learn to drive a car, and always traveled by
city bus. She frequently found it necessary to be "on duty" with the mentally
ill even when she was out and around the city. Geneva despised cruelty
toward the patients, and her quick willingness to speak out against such
abuse made several enemies over the course of her many years of service.
She was equally "motherly" toward he patients; even those who she had never
She often told of being on a city bus and stepping in to prevent potential
problems when a psychiatrically disturbed individual would be in a precarious
situation. Once she had chased off anyone who might be threatening the
psychotic individual, she would then discipline the disturbed one with
her "signature" opening line, "Now, what in the world is the matter with
you, acting like that?" If the "patient" refused to "settle down" and behave
in an acceptable manor, Geneva would pull the cord - take the rowdy individual
by the back of the neck - and physically remove them from the bus. She
often reflected on such instances with the words, "I'll bet everyone else
on that bus thought " I " was the crazy one!"
We each had our specialized patients. I, having Sign Language experience,
would be her interpreter with the deaf patients. She, on the other hand,
would step in for me when a female patient had a "personal" need to attend
to. We worked together for all of those many years in the most pleasant
and enjoyable symbiotic relationship.
I left Central State in 1988 to pursue jobs in education. Geneva stayed
on for another few years to finally retire in 1993, following 53 years
of service on the front lines and in the trenches of psychiatric patient
One day, Geneva came upon THE ugliest, dustiest, mean looking, pit-bull
puppy that had been abandoned. She took him in and raised "Bruiser" as
her own child. Not too surprisingly, Bruiser was always incredibly docile
and well behaved; and an excellent guard dog as well.
In the intervening years following our mutual departure from C.S.H.,
I would sometimes catch up with Geneva at here favorite coffee shop in
the Fountain Square district of town. Even then, there never seemed to
be enough time to laugh and enjoy each other's company.
I have been preoccupied recently with all of the details involved in
moving into a new house. I haven't been able to keep up with my regular
routine of reading the daily news paper.
Consequently, I missed Geneva's "first" obituary announcement following
her death on Good Friday, April 18th of this year, 2003. As it turned out,
almost everyone associated with her at Central State turned out at the
announced location to pay their respects to this amazing lady. Everyone
turned up - that is - except for Geneva. Through a very strange series
of mis-information, miscalculation, and other highly unlikely "foul ups",
"Geneva" never made it to her own funeral. The assembled well wishers had
ample opportunity to reflect on their fond memories of Geneva, and put
her to rest in their minds and hearts.
Plans for Geneva's "second" funeral were arranged, and another notice
appeared in the Indianapolis Star obituaries of April 25, 2003. I was,
again, preoccupied with the new house and, again, did not pay notice to
the obituaries. That Friday night (4-25-03) I was entertaining several
house guests and gave them a tour of the "far out / shagadellic" carpet
strips that came with the house; nailed to the basement wall. After a few
minutes in the basement, I felt a "presence" which I attributed as being
someone now in spirit who was associated with the decore in the basement.
The presence was so powerful that I began to become a little ill, and had
to call the tour short due to the strange "energy" that was resonating
in my throat and nostrils.
The next morning, I found myself with two unread morning papers, and
it seemed only appropriate that I should read the Friday paper before the
Saturday paper. It was then that I came upon Geneva's obituary. It was
startling to see, but not altogether "shocking". I knew that Geneva had
been in declining health for some time. Nonetheless, it was a difficult
task to read and accept the information.
The notice said that a memorial service would be held at Alpha Funeral
Services on Monday, April 28. I had never before heard of the business,
and had to look it up in the business white pages.
I was never quite sure how Geneva felt about death and the human response
to it. I had just enough of an idea to be able to consider that maybe Geneva
would not want a "funeral" per se. I realized that it was her that I had
felt as a "presence" in the basement the night before and asked of her
whether or not she would want me to attend the listed service. I let go
of the thought and awaited an unmistakable sign.
The next day (Sunday) I was merging into traffic on I-65 and fell in
behind a car with the personalized license plate, "GO 2 ALFA". (Message
As I was busy getting ready for the service that Monday morning, I
had to run out to the car to get some things from the front seat. There
- "out of the Blue" - sat an 8 week old female "Rot" puppy on the sidewalk
near my car. (Geneva had often expressed the desire to have also had a
female "Rot" to raise from a pup to be a companion for Bruiser.) The pup
followed me into the house and has refused to leave my side from that moment.
As we came walking through the front door for the first time, my stereo
was tuned to an "oldies" station; the words, "I'll have my special angel
here to watch over me" were coming through the speakers.
All I had to feed her for her first meal with me was left-over Thai
chicken (which she devoured with great enthusiasm).
In honor of Geneva, I decided to use the city bus to go to her funeral
(somehow it seemed "right" at the time). I arrived to find that the only
attendees for the "second" funeral would be Geneva's daughter and son-in-law,
We all agreed that Geneva had found some way to pull the right strings
to make that happen in the way that it did. I had been briefed on all of
the "high strangeness" surrounding the confusion about the original funeral,
and found it difficult to sit through the very private service - as the
minister spoke words of comfort - without looking at Geneva's miraculously
well preserved remains and not laughing as I considered, "Darn it Geneva,
you always SAID you'd be late to your own funeral, and you WERE!" Geneva
got the "last laugh", and - Bless you Dear Geneva - you shared it only
You are my Special Angel!
With much love and gratitude,
P.S. Thanks for my "other" guardian angel.
I named her "Asia".
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